Prayerfully Speaking

Hope from the Truths of God's Word

Is it Truth or Flattery?

Somehow I learned to say what I thought people wanted to hear. In my mind, it was the way to be nice and be a friend. It didn’t take long to lose a sense of what was true. In fact, I lost a sense of myself.

Have you struggled with this too?

It seemed like full tilt when I began to realize this was not a healthy response in relationships.What had been true to me, was in fact a lie. In fact, I realized I was actually manipulating people by saying things to bring a positive response.

God’s truth is “Whoever rebukes a person will in the end gain favor rather than one who has a flattering tongue.” Proverbs 28:23.

Flattery does not bring favor in the long run. It’s a short term solution – a near sighted choice.

The Bible does not flatter. And yet it is a letter from the one who loves each of us beyond our comprehension. It is our ultimate truth.

In Ephesians 4:15 we’re told – “Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.”

Speaking the truth in love always takes my mind to Jesus’ life-changing conversation with the woman at the well. Love wants what’s best for the other person. In love, Jesus “gently” confronted the woman’s lifestyle.  He held up the truth to her and the encounter changed her life. He didn’t shy away from the truth so that she would want to hang out with him. He was not afraid of rejection. He was more concerned with her eternity and how she experienced life on earth.

The more I am in relationship with God, the less I find myself flattering people. I’m bolder today than I could have ever imagined. I surprise myself at times with the bold things that come from my mouth. But I have a long way to go. I look forward to living without fear of anyone’s reaction as long as I represent Jesus’ extravagant love well and am a relentless warrior of His truth.

Today I am celebrating that Jesus was more than happy to show me my sin AND how much I am loved by him. I pray that I grow to do the same with those in my life and sphere of influence.

Where do you stand on the truth and flattery continuum?

About Jennifer O. White

I'm a simple wife who has discovered God's amazing gift of prayer. Here at Prayerfully Speaking I share my journey of unwrapping this gift. God invites us to ask Him, but His enemy works diligently to keep that from happening. I hope to offer you encouragement to believe God is ready to pour more into your life than you've ever imaged.

4 Replies

  1. Does this mean you’re going to stop flattering me?

    1. Jennifer White

      yes to the flattering – but will gladly encourage you!

  2. Personally, I loose patients and more importantly trust when people just tell you what you want to hear. I’ve been hurt badly in this way, because actions end up revealing the truth. It is better to be honest or say nothing.

    1. Jennifer White

      thanks for pointing out the damage that flattery and saying what we think others want to hear can do!