Prayerfully Speaking

Hope from the Truths of God's Word

Words that Changed Our Marriage

Six years ago our church hosted a marriage conference. Dave and I walked into God’s best for our marriage that weekend. Dr. Gary Smalley and his son Michael presented information that transformed the rest of our marriage. To make a LONG story shorter, we learned to:

  • Honor each other with words. David was great at this immediately. He spoke kind and supportive words about me to his family, my family and to me. It took me longer to adapt this strategy.  Gary explained that this was marriage insurance.  The kind words we spoke into each other and about each other would come back to us when we needed to be reminded why we were married.  He taught us to speak what we sometimes couldn’t see. He taught us to live a marriage of faith!
  • Respect each others differences. At the seminar, I witnessed approximately 1/4th of the audience stand with David to show they had the same basic personality traits. All that time, I thought Dave just didn’t get it. Truth was, I didn’t get that he just wasn’t wired to think just like me. And neither were hundreds of others.

Several years later we built a home near Branson, Missouri where Gary Smalley’s ministry is located.  And just like God, we fell in love with a church where Gary just happened to be one of the founding elders. So for the last 4 years, Dr. Gary Smalley has spoken God’s truth into our lives through conferences and church services.  He’s a personal mentor to our pastor who has taught us more about marriage than we ever knew we wanted to know!

Dr. Gary Smalley has truly impacted our marriage, our future, and the lives of those who are influenced by our relationship. Generations will be changed for the better because of God’s love and truth spoken to us through Gary, his books and his ministry.

In honor of Gary’s 70th birthday, we are Paying It Forward!  Our friend, Stephanie, created this incredible campaign to honor the man who taught us to honor – who taught us to give love in a BIG way!

We want to bless you with a book by Dr. Gary Smalley. Comment below why you would like to read one of the following books he has authored. We will use random.org to choose 3 winners. Winners will receive the book of their choice and be notified via the comment section here.

The DNA of Relationships

Change Your Heart, Change Your Life

From Anger to Intimacy, How Forgiveness Can Transform Your Marriage

The Language of Sex, Experiencing the Beauty of Sexual Intimacy

Get to know Gary and his ongoing ministry here. Connect with him on facebook here and wish him a belated “happy birthday!”

About Jennifer O. White

I’m a simple wife who has discovered God’s amazing gift of prayer. Here at Prayerfully Speaking I share my journey of unwrapping this gift. God invites us to ask Him, but His enemy works diligently to keep that from happening. I hope to offer you encouragement to believe God is ready to pour more into your life than you’ve ever imaged.

12 Replies

  1. We need it! The End! 🙂

  2. Louanne D ietrich

    My life has changed since I began reading Gary’s book, “Change your Heart, Change your Life”. I began memorizing scripture for the first time in my life. There is alot in that book that changed ME. Now, I am ready to work harder on US. Thank you Jesus for Gary’s great BIG heart.

  3. I would like to win “The DNA of Relationships” so I can improve my relationships with fellow Christians. My desire is to better minister to my fellow church members and build them up like they do me!

  4. Kim Fertig

    I just want to add to what Jennifer said so warmly and wonderfully. As I have told Gary in person at church, his books have been encouraging me even before I was a Christian. “For Better and For Best” gave me some simple suggestions on how to be a loving wife. “Winning Your Husband Back Before It’s Too Late” encouraged me during one of the most devastating times of my life, offering practical tips of survival through biblical wisdom. “The Language of Sex” is a wonderful book that I had the privilege of helping to edit, and I would recommend it to all newlyweds! Gary, thank you to you and Norma for spending your life and your marriage helping the rest of us. We all love and appreciate you.

    And, happy birthday!

  5. Thanks Jennifer for sharing. What an amazing man…what a great way to honor him. I would love to read more of Gary’s books to better learn how to counsel women as I travel and minister for God through His Love Extended. It’s great to glean wisdom from such men! 🙂

  6. I love Gary’s teaching! I actually haven’t heard him much lately and have missed his influence in my life. I remember a seminar we attended years ago where he said things that still whirl around in my brain and pop up at the perfect times. God definitely gifted him with wisdom and the gift of communication. All of those books you list sound good, but I think I’d most like to read “From Anger to Intimacy.”
    So glad God used Gary to help you and David! We all need help and so appreciate the ones God brings into our lives to grow us. Continued blessings on your marriage!

  7. I’d be happy to read any of Gary’s books! I could use some marriage inspiration!

  8. SomeGirl

    What a great idea! I’d love to win one of Gary Smalley’s books! The Language of Sex one sound intriguing (how embarrassing is that?). 🙂

  9. Jennifer

    You know, I think I could surely stand to read any one of those of books! I have seen, first hand, the difference in my dear friend these past years….how much happier you are, confident yet serene, and a faith that is nothing short of inspiring….Love You!

    1. Jennifer White

      Jen – the fact that you see the change makes me SO happy. Your happiness and serenity inspired me to want more for me life. Thank you for being YOU! and being my friend.

  10. Denise Gibson

    I would love to win ANY of the books…I attended the marriage seminar this year and will be forever changed. We have been so inspired by Gary and those he mentors, we drive over 1 1/2 hours one way to attend that church! Thank you God for Gary, Jennifer, and those like them at WHFC!

  11. Nancy Ellis

    How awesome Jennifer and Happy Birthday to you Gary. I would love to learn more about how to take my life with my husband to the next level. We also are blessed to learn from Gary and Ted at WHFC! Just returned from a Joyce Meyer ladies convention in St. Louis and met up with a group of ladies headed to one of Gary’s retreat weekends this weekend. Gary is reaching people all over this country.